go-to song

go-to song

my go-to song on play

volume up

don’t care how often i play it

because it’s never enough

song will always go

and i have no favorite part

because it is all my favorite 

i listen and i am whole again

there is no other music

song makes me look to the heavens

question my sanity

my sobriety 

my reality

until i realize that none of that matters

because song is what it is

i hear a new lyric every time i listen

even though i know it

by heart

i can anticipate its groove 

and enjoy where it takes me

look around to the world that isn’t so bad 

sometimes 

even when it can be pretty bad

sometimes 

i remember this when i have nothing

which is always

we always have nothing 

but you can enjoy a moment every now and again

that is an element that is in this song

as everything is

and the timbre of the music swirls around

until there is no escape from what music brings

song is a different world 

that i can’t begin to comprehend 

a journey we take togetherĀ 

a journey we take togetherĀ 

morning sun rises into an iridescent blanket 

rays on the road we travel 

and it’s unlike any moment we’ve seen before 

where the excitement of time with each other 

all the while we sit

watching the world as it changes with its infinite beauty 

dream bubbles lingering over heads 

getting our bearings 

and easing into the day

drifting into the open arms 

the welcoming embrace these green hills give us

and as we keep moving 

our dreams keep forming 

until the dream cloud sits low

and touches the ground

and then dream time is no different 

than waking

and we are wrapped up in joy 

the smiles we give to one another 

are all we need to know

day ends with light 

that permeates the sky

as if echoing through 

the calmed storm clouds

there is a rooftop 

that shimmers 

with the golden pink glow

of the setting sun

and a palm tree standing 

as its fronds flutter in the gentle breeze

farther off we hear people shouting

speaking forcefully 

with bold lettered signs advertising doom

the traffic hum lulls 

as the walkers step to an uneven beat

this radiating light covers it all

and has seen all like this — more and less

but this moment is only small 

and changes 

and is gone before 

we know it has finished

making magicĀ 

standing underneath a streetlight

dim artificial glow

rain falls around like glitter

and when the light hits right you are floating within stardust

darkness 

like a warm blanket 

hugs the sidewalk

barely seen tree outlines lean in close

and whisper good ideas to enact later

i write them down

i go (to myself)

oh that will be good

and i save it

i remember it

so that when it comes to transformation time

i can make magic

and wonder

appear on the page

a little bird

a little bird

ground i stand on while the light keeps shifting

warm sun seems like an anomaly 

and clouds’ shadows drift in the breeze

creating a space that reflects patches of light

and at the edges of park 

in between the brush

a sparrow finds a place

high up above the city walkways

speeding cars and the constant buzz of movement 

little bird can rest its wings

staring at me

i silently communicate back that i’m not a threat

and we both can be there

doing our thing

there’s an element of friendship in that

visualizing purple clouds

visualizing purple clouds

seeing the infinite landscape stretched out before me

cloud lines along the distant mountains 

just a scribble on the paper

in purple bleeding ink

soaks into the page and down into where the mountain meets the water

can you see it in double vision?

as something from within your imagination, a picture within the mind

and as a blank page ready to be filled with the etchings

markings that represent a complex situation

state of being

relationship

dynamic

symbols and visualization meet together and form a reality

this is something understood to be real

to be felt and lived and experienced 

a visual picture of the beauty we wish to see

wish to communicate 

articulate

and the translate into words

into paintings

which have a life of their own that they contend with

moving through the denseness of a forest

in a place 

where there are millions of trees

leaves create a temporary barrier

palm leaves brush past you while moving forward 

doesn’t matter the pace 

slow or moving fast through greenery

the air is thick with dew

and distant birds

animals calls echo

reverberating off the stems 

shaking

moving through 

underneath a canopy of light unseen

glimpses of rays peer down

but the forest floor can’t be found

damp steps 

feet sink into soft earth

and it could be this forest goes on forever 

always bending leaves back to part a way

sneak through the sharp edges

avoid scratches

or the potential stumble on a hidden rock 

pebble

branch

on the ground i can lie flat 

inching forward on fingertips

but the heaviness keeps me down longer than i want to be

even in a beautiful forest

moving with swiftness

moving with alacrity 

looseness 

is better than the vulnerability of staying in place

and the raindrops that fall to ground sink instantly 

or hang off the edges 

splashed onto the sides 

on my arms as i walk

hanging as if to drop when i stop to notice

one thing remains true

the relief of the deepness in the air in this forest

feels unlike anything else

and so i consider that for quite a while longer than one may need 

to truly understand