hand white knuckle gripping the only handle

tense collective standing 

cuz everyone’s gotta hold their ground 

can’t be touched

in the window my reflection fogs

tells me how irritable the moment is

elbows and fists intersect to find space

searching and yet losing one’s grip

doors open to the underworld 

exposing fresh cool air

more people depart

allies and enemies together on this train

yet we all stand

we all deal with the slippery floor from occasional downpours

each reason

each transgression

motivated by a Good Excuse

people forget niceness 

how politeness can make the burden lighter

and to just be in this moment can take everything we’ve got

still here we go

moving forward 

through the discomfort of evening

wishing 

hoping

searching for a better place

fixed destination in mind 

the primary focal point

that and one’s phone

notes from headphones deep with the brain

soothe

give strength and transform

transport

at every stop a sigh of relief as more get to where they need to be

maybe then i can be happy

maybe then i won’t be uncomfortable 

maybe then my dreams will be realized

because i will be 

one step closer